I need to say this..

It will always remain unknown and unsaid. The feelings we feel are so strong at times that we get overwhelmed. The outlet is none. I want to say something today. I do not want to stay until tomorrow. I want to express my gratitude for your being in my life. I may or may not get a chance later. I have been lucky to experience even a bit of u. May it be through touch , smell, talk or even sight. It has and will always be a pleasure. I still remember the moment we parted. You had no idea, but I knew and I tried really hard, to make u stay. I was helpless. I cried, wished it was all fake, deep down I had known this day would come. But I did not have the strength to think about it, and m broken today. I wonder at the pittance of my existence, I wonder at how powerless I am. No amount of being the good guy, no amount of doing what you say can bring you back. I see a lot of people staring at me as I cry. And for this one moment I do not care, even if any amount of making a fool of myself in public could bring you back, I would do it. I am desperate. But you make me realize I have missed the train. What can I say now? What can I do?

There is nothing on my mind except you now. I wish I could get over you. Been a couple of years now , and I still miss you so bad. The memory of our parting is so clear in my mind that I can spell the minutest of details.

I remember how I used to repel you on the slightest acknowledgement of yours highlighting my affection, and I could always see you crave for it. I think I made a huge mistake. I should have told u repeatedly how much I loved u. Though u knew it deep down inside, I should have said it more. I am not a freak, I am a part of you who still lingers for your touch. Who still has the memories that make me laugh and cry at the same time, and feel the emptiness that you left.

I see you fade away in front of me, I cannot explain how much of a loser I feel, I have no control over it. Its time for you to go, and m not okay with the fact. Yesterday it was all normal, you cannot walk right out on me. Its not fair.

I am overwhelmed right now, I cannot think clearly, this bad I feel at the moment. The only regret is that I should have held your hand and said how much you meant to me each passing day.. Sigh!